'Widow is a Five Letter Word': A t-shirt company aiming to create community over loss

MILWAUKEE (CBS 58) -- A pair of friends met in an unlikely way- while both were grieving the lives of their husbands. Through chats about the ebbs and flows of grief, they decided to put those thoughts on t-shirts in hopes of helping other widows and widowers. Their company called Widow is a Five Letter Word.

"On the surface I would say yes it's an online t-shirt company but it's also a way to connect widows to widows- also widowers," said Ilana Cabrera, one of the founders of Widow is a Five Letter Word.

It’s a side gig both Lisa Koffman and Ilana Cabrera did not see coming.

But it's one where both get to express what they've gone through and what they know others have gone through while grieving a loss-- all on a t-shirt.

"It’s a way to share stories, a way to express grief in the products that we sell. It’s a way that we tell people that we want to talk about it," said Cabrera.

Their online store has been live since 2023. Some shirts with serious messages and others with the purpose of providing comedic relief.

"Sometimes it's just a stage of grief sometimes it's just a funny thought like the ' I kissed a corpse' goes along with the katy perry song. I laughed. I thought of it, and I laughed so hard," said Koffman.

The idea of Widow is a Five Letter Word began after Koffman and Cabrera met through a support group.

"We started walking and talking and sharing common experiences, thoughts, and we have a similar sense of humor and we both have a love of t-shirts. And it was like ' hey this needs to be a shirt,'" said Koffman.

During the pandemic- both women who live near Bayside lost their significant others.

Koffman says a trip to the ER ended tragically in losing her husband Mike, who was complaining about hip pain. He dealt with muscular dystrophy and was ventilator dependent.

"Most likely the hip pain was some blood clot or something, I mean his heart was failing but I didn't know he was going to die that day. I had no idea," said Koffman.

Mike will be remembered for his sense of humor and for his love of cooking.

Cabrera said she lost her husband in a freak accident.

"My husband Dave, or David, had an accident in our home. He fell down our stairs in Nov. of 2020. He sustained a severe traumatic brain injury among other injuries and never woke up again," said Cabrera.

She said her husband will be remembered for being a great father and neighbor.

By sharing their stories-- they hope to normalize the deep and dark feelings that come with grief.

"Part of our t-shirts, they open-up a conversation you know because people, they want to talk about it. You know I like it when people talk about my husband," said Koffman.

And hope to normalize life even after losing a loved one.

"Grief is this little thing that's kind of always with you. You know you don't stop grieving; I will grieve until I die. I will always love and miss him, that doesn't go away. But my life grows around that."

Their t-shirts with the purpose to ultimately build a community around loss. They owe that all to their families.

"We have fun doing this but really its dedicated to our husbands and our children. And our kids see us doing this they have fun sort of helping out here and there and our husbands would be so proud," said Cabrera.